'I was so busy praising him that I never stopped to just listen. I was so uncomfortable with his feelings, I quickly swooped in to fix the bad feelings.' This is a must-read for all parents.
comes from being smart, gifted, and accomplished, right? I thought if I could just “help” steer his ship into some positive school experiences, the impact would overshadow the pain, anxiety, and loneliness that come from being different.When my son began to have such horrible anxiety that we could not safely get him to school anymore, I had the “” moment. My fixing wasn’t fixing ANYTHING.
So, I got to work and started making changes. It was time to find new parenting tools and put the old ones away. I got busy supporting my son instead of intruding on him with my solutions and advice. How do parents shift from fixing to supporting? ADHD can leave our children doubting themselves, feeling different and misunderstood. Children with ADHD receive 20,000negative messages during their childhood than other kids. How many of those negative messages come from us, the parents?One way parents can support their child with ADHD, is to shift from being a fixer to being a container. A fixer advises, a container listens. A fixer lectures, a container understands.
Want to try it in your family? Here’s how being a container can communicate more love and support to your child.Be a safe place for your child to share and explore his feelings. Listen to him with a single intent: To understand his experience. Resist the temptation to solve anything. Instead, simply
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