Here’s how three parents are navigating a relocation, what it means for kids, and how experts advise co-parents handle the situation.
like “decision-making responsibility” and “parenting time.” The idea that, if it’s in their best interests, kids should get to spend as much time with each of their parents as possible is now reflected in the law.Relocation was a big topic, too. There are certain “best interest” criteria that courts can now consider when evaluating a move, and, depending on the parenting time split, relocating parents might have to prove the proposed move adheres to them.
She was surprised that she couldn’t take her kid back to Toronto, even though it was their hometown, and where she had her support system. “There’s no guarantee you have any right to move,” she says., a social worker and family mediator, also located in Burlington, Ontario. That’s in part because the legal system used to prioritize keeping children with mothers full-time. “There still exists this mentality of ‘I’m the mom, I have the children and I can do whatever I want,’” she says.
Shelley Cook cautions against parents projecting their own interests on their children. “I often hear ‘My child just wants me to be happy,’” she says. “No, they don’t. They want security and stability.” Sometimes a relocation is the best way to achieve that.That’s why Conrad Melnik* is moving from Montreal to Vancouver. Unlike Hannah and Fiona, he and his ex-wife have always had a difficult relationship. “I wouldn’t even call us co-parents,” he says.
Next, bring it to the kid—together. “That way they know both parents are on board with the plan,” says Cook. Peachey says it’s on both parents to keep things positive, for the sake of the children. “That’s one of the biggest rules in co-parenting. You can have your feelings about a move, but this is not about you.”
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