Children generally don't like getting punished. They’re more likely to feel sorry for themselves rather than sorry for what they did. Here's a better way to respond to misbehavior, explains tomlickona
When they’re told they have to take a time out for misbehavior, kids often get angry, cry, or sulk. However, they're less likely to do that if they understand its positive purpose. It’s not to make them feel bad. It's to help them calm down if they need to, and then think about what they did that was not okay—and what they should have done instead. So don't call it"time out"; call it The Thinking Chair .
You can make up for not being nice to your brother by reading him a story while I’m getting the dinner on.think you can do to make things better?” Schools that use restitution have had success in reducing discipline problems." It’s certainly a legitimate exercise of our parental authority to establish a rule and consequence unilaterally: “If you hit, you must sit.” “Be home by curfew or let us know the reason you’re running late. Otherwise, lose driving privileges for a week.
First of all, I suggest not calling it a"punishment." Kids usually experience punishment as something we impose on them rather than something that resulted from their actions. I encourage you to talk instead about"fair consequences." Ask your child,"What do you think is a fair consequence—something that will really work to motivate you not to do this again?”
If that plan doesn't work to your satisfaction, sit down and put your heads together again:"How can we make our plan work better? Do we need a different consequence? A strategy to help you remember our agreement?"Joe, age 11, promised to lock up his new bike, a birthday present, whenever he took it anywhere. He knew that bikes were being stolen in his community.
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