Whether he is a ‘hide and seek’, an ‘ATM’ or ‘fly on the wall’ dad, he has a role to play in the lives of our youth
A scene from the 'Fathers Matter' film series – 'Family Portrait'. Ayize with their baby girl, Zenzile.In the 30 years that I’ve been involved in addressing some of our region’s most pressing health and social issues, including GBV, HIV/Aids and child abuse, I have never encountered an issue that is as emotionally charged and resonant — with as many people across all sectors of our society — as fatherhood.
Whatever people’s experience of their dads, for most of us, his influence is profound. How he does or does not show up matters to us. But is this just an emotional issue? Does his presence or absence really make any difference to our lives? In fact, many single mothers do an amazing job of raising balanced, productive and happy children. But single parenting often comes at great personal cost, which could be reduced by having more active, present fathers or father figures.
The good news is it is eminently possible to inspire and support many more fathers and father figures to be active, positive and present in children’s lives and, in so doing, yield real long-term benefits for our society. The lack of money is also a barrier in some cultures where payment is expected for “damages” for children conceived out of wedlock and for lobola. If this is not paid, the father is often prevented from being present. This in the context of mass unemployment.
Our health system can also be a barrier. Research has shown that if a man is present in the antenatal and birth process, he is much more likely to be present in the child’s life as they grow up.
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