Dear Care and Feeding: If my wife keeps at it like this, she's surely going to give our daughter a complex.
Being neurodivergent can be hard, because despite growing awareness and acceptance about things like ADHD, the person with the condition is—nine times out of 10—the one who has to adapt to the world, rather than the other way around. It can often feel inequitable and burdensome.
But, ADHD isn’t an unlimited hall pass. You don’t get to blow off the feelings of others. You learn, adapt, and find coping techniques that enable you to work around or harness your ADHD symptoms so that you can successfully navigate society. We can talk long and hard about the ethics and balance of asking neurodivergent folks to fit into mainstream social norms versus changing those norms to allow more variability, but that’s beyond the scope of this letter.
to do a great job discussing ADHD from a family perspective. Some of his work might be of use as you, Anne, and the family navigate this. Good luck, I hope they’re open to your feedback.I have been living in the same house as my parents, my younger adult sister and her three school-age children for the kids’ entire lives.
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