'We spent the last weekend together and I think I caught feelings.'
with your biggest problems — and I'm solving 'em right here on BuzzFeed, one DM at a time. Let's get right to it.
Today we've got this woman, who's been secretly hooking up with her stepcousin for years . She wants to know whether this is a relationship she can take to the next level. Here's what she wrote to me:Note: In followup DMs, the writer clarified two key points: 1) She did not grow up knowing this guy — her stepmom came into her life post-childhood. 2) When she and this man were in other relationships, they did not cheat with each other.
Well, I'm not surprised you caught feelings — five years of incredible sex with someone might do that to you! And I'lla guess, given that he's still sneaking around with you half a decade later, that he might have caught a few feelings too.Look, I'll be honest: If you weren't already deep into this affair, I probably would have advised youto pursue a romantic entanglement with your stepcousin.
. There will be drawbacks to dating someone so closely tied to your family — as you said, Christmas will likely get awkward if you ever break up. But let's be real: You've been more or less engaged in a secret affair with this man for the past five years. I'm pretty sure the holidays would get awkward even if you stopped right now. Perhaps that train has left the station.So my advice is to proceed, with lots of caution and care.
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