PSA, 'default parents': Here are five ways to stop doing all of the emotional labor.
The Smart Woman’s Guide to Healing from a Breakup or Divorce.” But that’s the worst time and way to do it.
Try not to frame your points as complaints. Instead, frame them as observations — like, “Hey, I’ve noticed that I am doing a lot more of XYZ and it is taking a lot out of me. And I’m wondering if you have noticed that too?” “I” statements instead of “you” statements can also be helpful, according to Sussman.
“Ownership of a particular task means remembering it, planning for it, then following through — without needing to be reminded.”“Having to remind your partner to do something doesn’t take that something off your list. It adds to it,” Rodsky If you’re going to try and swap tasks or lessen your load, it’s important to first agree to what Rodsky calls a minimum standard of care for that particular act. Would a reasonable person, under similar circumstances, do the task in roughly the same way as you? she asks. If yes, great! You’ve met the minimum standard of care. If not, you haven’t really done it.
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