Teens are not made for isolation, which makes COVID19 especially hard on them. Here's how to help your teenager to see the bigger picture.
Teenagers and college students have amplified innate, developmental motivations that make them hard to isolate at home. The hormonal changes that come with puberty conspire with adolescent social dynamics to make them highly attuned to social status and peer group. Friends feel like. Social isolation is hard for humans of all ages, but it is more profoundly distressing for adolescents—especially if they all think that their friends are all hanging out without them.
What can we do to encourage teens to comply with social-distancing measures? We need to work with their existing motivations. Teens are unlikely to be persuaded by arguments that conflict with their innate, developmental motives. They can help with meal prep and household cleaning. We expect our kids to keep family spaces clear of their belongings, and also to help with actual cleaning by vacuuming and wiping down the counters. Being nice to their siblings—keeping conflict low amid tight quarters—is a meaningful contribution.
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