How to Control Your Emotions During a Difficult Conversation

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How to Control Your Emotions During a Difficult Conversation
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How to cool yourself down if you get worked up: 1. Breathe. 2. Focus on your body. 3. Say a mantra. 4. Acknowledge and label your feelings. 5. Take a break.

He is so wrong about that and it’s making me madLabeling like this allows you to see your thoughts and feelings for what they are: “transient sources of data that may or may not prove helpful.” When you put that space between these emotions and you, it’s easier to let them go — and not bury them or let them explode.. In my experience, this is a far-underused approach. The more time you give yourself to process your emotions, the less intense they are likely to be.

Keep in mind that you’re probably not the only one who’s upset. Your counterpart is likely to express anger or frustration too. While you may want to give them the above advice, no one wants to be told they need to breathe more deeply or take a break. So you may be in a situation where you just need to let the other person vent. That’s usually easier said than done though. It’s hard not to yell back when you’re being attacked, but that’s not going to help.

Let’s face it. Conflicts with coworkers can be tough. But you’re not going to solve the underlying issues or maintain a positive relationship if you barrel through the conversation when you’re completely worked up. Hopefully, these five tactics will help you move from angry and upset to cool as a cucumber.Accelerate your career with Harvard ManageMentor®. HBR Learning’s online leadership training helps you hone your skills with courses like Difficult Interactions.

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