DearPrudie: “I only want to be in relationships in which my significant others very openly cheat on me. The problem: So far, they have all fallen in love with others.”
• Call the voicemail of the Dear Prudence podcast at 401-371-DEAR to hear your question answered on a future episode of the show.I’ve been divorced for about a year and a half now. It was very painful. The woman I thought was the love of my life for the previous 12 years had been cheating on me. I noticed we had been distant and tried to discuss it and asked for counseling, and each time I was told there was nothing wrong or she was just tired or stressed.
We separated shortly after the affair and I moved in with a friend. About three months into the separation I was out drinking and met a new woman. She was way out of my league but was so sweet and funny and very compassionate. I ended up not only sleeping with her that night but kind of dating her for about a month. It had been years since I had felt so loved and validated both as a man and as a person. She was so good to me, but I finally confessed to still being married.
If I’ve understood your timeline correctly, you only started dating this woman after your wife admitted to having an affair and you moved out. I don’t say that to diminish how painful it must have been for your sort-of-girlfriend to learn you’d been keeping something so significant from her, merely that as far as your ex-wife is concerned, whom you’ve dated after you moved out isn’t really any of her business—and if you do tell her, and she gets upset, it’s not really your problem.
A: I’m not quite sure what “getting better internet security” would entail when it comes to “My husband claims he didn’t write a single sexually explicit series of text messages on his account.” While that scenario is, I think the most likely explanation by far is that he wrote them, that he’s embarrassed and reluctant to cop to an affair , and that he’s lying.I got married in 1988 and changed my name. When I got divorced I kept that name.
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