An unexpected element of retirement is that a couple may not have the same plans or outlook for retirement, leading to conflict and growing apart.
Retirement is a phase of life filled with unique challenges that can become even more daunting when a spouse is involved.
The divorce rates for people over 50 are increasing globally and have tripled since 1990 for the age group above 65. The main factor for this tendency is the disconnect among many retired couples. A good way to start a discussion is for each party to complete my “Couples Retirement Assessment”. It is a questionnaire with 28 questions, each with four potential answers:
If you want to join my retirement community, join here. You will be redirected to the website, where you can complete your details. Only complete what you are comfortable with. This community is not only for retirees but for anyone concerned about retirement or wishing to retire successfully.I will now cover a few strategies that will hopefully help to move you a bit closer together as a couple, starting with:It is common to hear people say, “We’re too busy” or “We just don’t have time”.
What do you think will happen to your relationship in retirement if some of the issues you have disagreed on are not addressed?Some people are more comfortable sharing thoughts, while others prefer to share feelings. Understand your partner and how they prefer to share. A common communication barrier for couples is that one focuses more on logic and the other on feeling. As a result, they often feel like the other isn’t hearing them or doesn’t get them.
It may mean that you seek external help to accomplish this. No, you don’t necessarily need a psychologist, but a counsellor or a retirement coach can provide you with the tools to manage this. Note that I said, “for you to manage this”. Someone else cannot solve the problem; you need to do it. ADVERTISEMENT CONTINUE READING BELOW Use “I” statements .
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