SILVER SPRING, MD—Speaking in a stern tone and wagging a finger, Food and Drug Administration commissioner Robert Califf made an announcement Wednesday in which he warned Americans to take that out of their mouths this instant. “That’s dirty, you can’t have that—spit it out, I said spit it out right now!” said Califf,…
SILVER SPRING, MD—Speaking in a stern tone and wagging a finger, Food and Drug Administration commissioner Robert Califf made an announcement Wednesday in which he warned Americans to take that out of their mouths this instant.
“That’s dirty, you can’t have that—spit it out, I said spit it out right now!” said Califf, who reportedly struggled to suppress the panic rising in his voice as he urged tight-lipped Americans to drop it immediately. “I’m warning you. You’re going to be sick if you eat that. You don’t know where that’s been. Don’t make me count to three. One. Two. No! Don’t swallow! Do not swallow!” At press time, Califf was heard exclaiming “Ah, fuck!” as Americans vomited all over his hands.
South Africa Latest News, South Africa Headlines
Similar News:You can also read news stories similar to this one that we have collected from other news sources.
FDA pushes cancer trials to include more elderly peopleOlder people make up the majority of cancer patients, but only represent about one-quarter of cancer clinical trial participants. New FDA recommendations aim to change that.
Read more »
New FDA approved drug could help cure mast cell tumors in dogsA new FDA-approved drug claims to cure most mast cell tumors, in some cases with only a single injection.
Read more »
Congress moves to give FDA new powers over synthetic nicotine products including a youth favorite — Puff Bar e-cigarettesLawmakers tout a provision that would make laboratory-made nicotine subject to federal regulation.
Read more »
US banning Russian oil imports as Biden warns of 'costs' to AmericansThe move follows pleas by Ukrainian President Volodmyr Zelenskyy to U.S. and Western officials to cut off the imports.
Read more »
US banning Russian oil imports as Biden warns of 'costs' to AmericansThe move follows pleas by Ukrainian President Volodmyr Zelenskyy to U.S. and Western officials to cut off the imports.
Read more »