People aren't born with self-discipline—they have to learn it. Here's what can happen if they don't, writes jwebbphd
But why does this happen? People aren’t born with self-discipline. In fact, these skills are learned and are reliant on how we were parented as children. When our parents discipline us as they raise us, we internalize the ability to discipline ourselves as adults.By making sure you dedicated time after school to homework, or by making sure you didn’t go out with your friends until your homework was completed.
By giving you chores and making sure you followed through. By not doing it for you in times when you forgot. And especially by making you do your chore even when you were on the couch watching TV and didn’t want to.By changing your curfew after you broke it. And by changing it back once you showed them you could follow it.
By having family dinners. Perhaps your mom would call you in from playing outside and you moaned and groaned. While you may not have realized it at the time, you were learning to do important, healthy things, even when you don’t feel like it. Children do not know how to override their desires naturally. They need guidance from their caregivers to foster their sense of self-discipline. The parental actions and responses above teach children many things, but most important of all is that they care. Having rules is like saying to your child, “What you do is important because you are important.
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