Should you love your spouse more than your kids?
Can you please weigh in on the subject of “who should one love more” between a spouse and your children? My husband and I recently had an argument over this issue. He believes spouses should love each other first and “more” than they love their children. His reasoning is that this love provides the stable base for the family, and our partnership comes before the children.
We love people in wildly different ways. We love our children unconditionally, and in even the happiest marriages our love for our spouse remains conditional, so if you have some extra energy, you might as well toss it in their direction. He tried to tell me since he wasn’t comfortable with it I shouldn’t do it again. I countered that the baby was very safe in the care of a trusted friend, amongst many other adults whom I know and trust, and not more than 100 feet away. I wanted to validate his feelings of anxiety as a new parent, but refused to agree that I would never do it again. It would have been impossible for either of us to manage our baby in that situation, and to me it was a perfect solution.
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