In today's Dear Annie column, Annie Lane tries to help a frustrated parent repair their relationship with one of their sons.
Annie Lane tries to help a frustrated pair of parents repair their relationship with a son who will only communicate with them through letters. We have two adult children in their 20s. Child A got herself into a legal situation and asked for our help, which we provided. We told no one of the situation because it wasn’t anyone’s business, and it was private. Child B learned of this and isn’t speaking to us for not disclosing the information.
We explained that it wasn’t for us to disclose and told him to speak to his brother if he has any issues or concerns. We have been cut off from Child B for “lying, toxic behavior and gaslighting.” We have tried to initiate a conversation to clear things up, but Child B insists on written communication only. It is killing my wife that Child B will not speak with us.
Child B might feel left out; he might feel entitled to know more about the situation given that he is a member of the family; or he might be upset that his brother got into legal trouble in the first place. Explain to him that it simply was not your information to share. He should feel comforted by the fact that he can trust you both if and when he ever has an equally sensitive problem.
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