Last time she tried to undermine me, I barked at her. She didn’t reply.
It has now turned to my grandchildren. For example, if I correct their table manners at a family dinner, she comes back with a smart comment like, “You can leave your elbows on the table” or “It’s OK to eat that with your fingers.”
I do not want to harm our otherwise decent relationship. She has no grandkids of her own yet and occasionally babysits my grandkids. Is there something better I can do?Talk to your sister-in-law and lay down some ground rules. Tell her that as much as you care about her, there are certain parameters it is important that she understand in her interactions with the grandkids. Explain what they are.
If I’m planning a dinner out or something else where I think he might invite his son, I preface it with a grownups-only clause. I can’t discuss it with my sister-in-law because even though I know she would understand, she wouldn’t be tactful in mentioning it to my brother.
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