Dear Abby weighs in on a mother-in-law who openly adorns her Priest and European vacation plans that are making one wife very uncomfortable.
My husband and I have been together for six years. Until about 18 months ago, my mother-in-law and I got along swimmingly. Unfortunately, that relationship has become troubled. The cause is her deep involvement with her church, indoctrinating our toddler with her religious beliefs and, finally, her deep physical attraction to her priest. She believes this last topic is acceptable to confide to me. Needless to say, it has made me very uncomfortable, and I have begun avoiding her.
This is difficult because she and my father-in-law live in the downstairs apartment of our home. My husband, thankfully, understands my position. We both have spoken to his mother several times, to no avail. I’ve reached the end of my rope, and I’m asking for any advice you may have as to how to handle this awkward situation.
I have expressed my unease to my husband and asked if we could have two separate hotel rooms. He was very upset at my suggestion and said it will cost him more to arrange two rooms. He now wants to cancel the trip due to my “selfishness.” Am I being unreasonable?Because your husband feels he cannot afford to pay for completely separate accommodations, tell him you will agree to his plan with certain ground rules in place.
Give it a try, and you may be pleasantly surprised to find you like your brother-in-law and his lady friend. If it turns out you don’t, you do not have to go along on your husband’s next visit, which may not happen for another quarter of a century. Dear Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren, also known as Jeanne Phillips, and was founded by her mother, Pauline Phillips. Contact Dear Abby at DearAbby.com or P.O. Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.
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