Such conversations are essential to stop us second-guessing the dying. What do you think? NeilHumphreys Death endoflife
End-of-life planning, with the card game"Will of Fortune by Immortalize" by NUS students. made me think of my mother’s ambition to do something disturbing to a garden gnome. She wants to drill a hole in its bottom.
His thinking was not untypical of those contemplating mortality. As far as he was concerned, if he didn’t discuss it, it didn’t exist, rather like Manchester United. His denial was admirably stubborn and perhaps even noble, but it’s now turned the rest of the family into amateur sleuths, working on our deductive reasoning to honour his wishes.
The matter remains unresolved, months after his passing. Respecting his wish not to mention the unmentionable before his death makes it difficult to respect his wishes after his death. We don’t know for sure what they were. The attitude persists. Findings from a ComRes study in 2015 revealed that 72 per cent of the British public were uncomfortable discussing dying, death and bereavement. The same survey showed that only 35 per cent had written a will and only 27 per cent had talked to someone about their funeral plans. Just 7 per cent had written down their preferences for end-of-life care, which can lead to a harrowing outcome for all concerned.
It’s just not done, especially in Singapore, where even the mention of the word can be considered uncouth, tempting fate in a way that is not appreciated. In 2014, a Lien Foundation surveyshowed that only 50 per cent of Singaporeans have ever talked about death or dying with family members.
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