It is our responsibility to notice what we are thinking, and to own that this is our perception based on our own deep beliefs.
To follow up from last week’s article “It’s not about you”, I felt it important to address the other side of the coin. What if you are one of those people who is accused of making everything about you and taking everything personally?
Do you often think people do things you don’t like on purpose just to upset or control you? “You did that just to piss me off” or “You are trying to control me by…” It is very hard to sustain a meaningful relationship with people like this. Their angry negative personalities drive people away, which further reinforces the idea that they are unlovable and not worthy attention… and the behaviour cycle continues.
What can we do to turn this around? The first step is to acknowledge that this is a personality trait we may possess. If you notice people being resistant to you it is important to ask yourself why. What were you just thinking or saying prior to eliciting this negative response in the other person. Did you just lapsed into a pattern of victim mindset. With mindful self-awareness you can notice whether your thoughts are making you feel empowered or making you feel victimized and mistreated.
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