With the relationship between the pop star and all-pro tight end continuing to dominate the news cycle for some reason, The Onion asked Chiefs fans to name a single Taylor Swift song, and this is what they said.
Robert Bartecka, Conservationist “‘Monkey Got Your Dick ’?” Elizabeth Lee, Social Worker “I want to say…‘Mouth For War’?” Amanda Carter, Pharmacist “‘Cowboys From Hell’?” Brendan Whitney, Party Planner “‘I’m Going To Kill And Eat Travis Kelce’?” Ted Landon, Customer Service Rep “There’s probably one called, like, ‘Breakup.’” Clinton Marcus, Carpenter “Sorry, I only know Sabrina Carpenter songs.” Mark O’Connell, Store Clerk “Oh, hey! Yeah, interesting question to ask me as a Chiefs fan.
” Neal Langer, Technician “If she doesn’t have an infectious pop cover of the Monday Night Football theme song recorded and charting by the Chiefs’ Monday night game against the Eagles on Nov. 20, Travis must break up with her.” Justin Leone, Paralegal “‘That’s easy. ‘Buttons,’ from when she was a member of the Pussycat Dolls.” Grant Lowe, Sales Manager “‘Don’t Refresh That Google Doc ’ from the era when she was dating Larry Page.
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