Everything that happened in Outlander's season 5 premiere—from Brianna and Roger's wedding to the return of Stephen Bonnet.
The droughtlander is over, and—much like Jamie's low-ponytail—is back. The Season 5 premiere a) featured a sex montage, and b) set the stage for some pretty high stakes drama. Obviously, we have a lot to talk about including my thesis on why Roger is The Worst™, so let's get right to it.Great news, Jamie heard my cries for help and has decided to grow out his bangs, resulting in a resplendent fashion pony similar to the one I wore in middle school.
Everyone gets colonially lit at the wedding and then, friends, we get to the wedding night. For reasons that have yet to be explained, we're forced to watch Roger, decked out in a billowing linen blouse, sing Frank Sinatra to Brianna on the guitar. It's best described as, much like the follow-up montage of Brianna and Roger having sex while Claire and Jamie also have sex.
Fortunately, Roger steps up after a super tense conversation with Aunt Jacosta, during which Jacosta implies that Jeremiah isn’t his baby. Look, I dislike Roger as much as everyone else on this show, but Jacosta's lecture does the trick and inspires him to do the right thing. Meaning, Roger cuts his finger and wipes blood all over Jeremiah's head while declaring “you’re blood of my blood.
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