Dear Amy: ‘Tis the season for wedding advice, I guess. My partner and I are planning a very small affair on a low budget. We recently recruited my future mother-in-law to help with last-minute plan…
We recently recruited my future mother-in-law to help with last-minute planning .My plan was to have everyone serve themselves.
It sounds as if you have a helpful and hands-on family and friend group. You could also accept their help – perhaps in shifts. This is a communal celebration meal, and for many people, helping to serve would be an honor. I have always thought we were “meant to be.” We have lots of mutual interests; we laugh, we talk when there is a problem, and we don’t keep secrets.
Finally, I talked and was crying and told him how terribly hurt I was. He said he wouldn’t do it anymore. I asked how long he had been doing this, and he said for a few years.Dear Devastated: The reason your husband kept this a secret is because he knew how you would react, and he didn’t want to cope with your emotions and feelings of betrayal. I strongly suspect that he loves and values you, and he doesn’t want to hurt your feelings.
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